


Protection

by Ghastly_lemons



Series: Protection [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Dean is chronically uncomfortable, Draco is trying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Harry Potter Epilogue What Epilogue | EWE, Healing, Hermione is working through things, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Theo is finding himself, luna is wonderful, slowburnish
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-12
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:02:33
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27526561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghastly_lemons/pseuds/Ghastly_lemons
Summary: Hermione, Dean, and Luna have a quiet shadow around school when they return after the war. Drawing him out may help in more ways than they thought.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Draco Malfoy
Series: Protection [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2097951
Comments: 6
Kudos: 66





	1. Reassurance

“Hello Hermione. Do you mind if we join you?”

Hermione looked up from her potions essay to see a smiling Luna Lovegood and a slightly uncomfortable looking Dean Thomas had found her hidden table at the back of the Library. Blinking owlishly, she gestured to the seats in front of them. “Of course. Did you need help with an essay?”

Luna shook her head as she sat and then turned to look at the library shelves to the side of the table. “Draco, would you join us?” Luna smiled serenely as Draco Malfoy appeared from behind the nearest shelf, face impassive, and joined them at the table with an air of complete aristocratic indifference, gazing at the autumn sky out the nearby window. Hermione wasn’t even surprised, as Malfoy seemed to show up where ever she was with irritating regularity since they returned to Hogwarts after the war.

Dean shifted in his seat and looked at the table with an intensity rarely seen on his easy going face. “Alright, I-“ Luna placed a hand on his shoulder to stop him.

“Hermione, how are you?” Lunas dreamy question took Hermione aback, especially seeing as she was looking directly at Malfoy when she asked it.

“Uh, good? I just have this essay to finish and then I’m going to head to Hagrids for afternoon tea.” 

“Oh, how lovely. I do enjoy his tea, but I must remember that his sweets are rather hard on my jaw.” Luna kept her eyes on Malfoy, who now looked tense despite not moving a single muscle. “And you Dean? How are you?”

“Good. I’m good.” Dean was looking at Hermione with and expression that told her to play along, but that he wished he didn’t have to.

“Oh, that’s good to hear. I’m feeling quite good too. This year has been tremendous for me, I haven’t lost a single shoe. Though I do still enjoy going barefoot.” Luna relaxed back into her seat with a dreamy smile. “So you see Draco, it is very easy to ask how we are. I for one would be happy to answer.”

Malfoy gave an almost imperceptible nod, pushed himself up from his chair and vanished through the Library towards the exit. He hadn’t looked at any of them since he appeared.

“Luna, what on earth was that?” Hermione asked, completely confused by the short exchange.

“Oh, Draco has been following the three of us trying to make sure we are ok. I’m sure it’s been very difficult as there is only one of him.” Luna smiled as though that was all the explanation needed.

“What? Why?” Hermione’s brain turned over the reasons why Malfoy would possibly do that and came up blank.

“Hermione, we were all at the Manor. Luna was there for ages, my leg was broken and then I was denied treatment, and you were… yeah.” Dean cleared his throat and tapped the table. “Anyway, Luna and I both noticed him following us a fair bit, as well as you. Luna figured out why though. She reckons he’s a bit traumatised by everything and is kinda trying to make up for it. He’s just rubbish at it.”

“He is a bit rubbish at it, if stalking is how he does it.” Hermione wasn’t happy to discover the mild paranoia she’d had about his presence being intentional was justified, but she was quite unsure about how to feel about the potential reasons behind it. “Are you sure that’s what he’s doing?”

Luna gave her a long look before speaking “I believe so, Hermione. He is not only very proud, but he is scared. He doesn’t know how to apologise, and has no idea if we would even accept or want that.” Luna spoke with conviction that brooked no argument, a rarity for the soft-spoken Ravenclaw.

Hermione sighed and pushed her essay aside. “Ok, what do we do about it?”

“Let him know you’re ok when you see him. That’s what he needs.” Luna patted Hermione’s hand and stood. “It’s a very small thing to do for someone.”

Dean stood as well. “Yeah, I think I can do that. Uh, see you guys later, I’m gonna write Seamus and get some… stuff done.” With a wave, Dean disappeared almost as fast as Malfoy had.

“Alright, if only to get him to stop following me around.” Hermione offered a dry smile to Luna, then checked the time. “I could probably pack up here and head to Hagrids now. Want to join me?”

“Oh, that sounds delightful. I think I shall.”

\-----

Over the next week, Hermione made an effort to let Malfoy know she was fine, usually with either a quick smile if she caught him staring or simply saying so if he was close enough to hear. Dean seemed to prefer gruff nods, while Luna sought Malfoy out and told him how many wrackspurts she had that day. All in all, Hermione wasn’t thrilled to be doing it. She didn’t want him following her, and thought that he owed them the effort instead of the other way around. She did, however, have to admit that Malfoy left a whole lot faster if she acknowledged him. After a while it became routine. See blonde hair, say she’s fine, go back to whatever was interrupted. Malfoy never seemed to care to respond, which deepened her irritation somewhat.

After nearly a month of this, Dean sat down next to her on the couch one wet evening in the Gryffindor common room.

“Malfoy helped me today. Spoke too.”

Hermione was actually quite shocked. “How? What happened?”

“Slipped on some leaves in the courtyard. Malfoy appeared out of bloody nowhere and grabbed my arm so I didn’t fall. Said to be careful and took off.” Dean frowned at the fire “Dunno what to do about him, really. I mean, he’s stalking me less, so that’s nice. But it’s still weird as all hell.”

“He leaves me alone faster if I say something now, too.” Hermione sighed “Still appears like a blasted ghost all the time though.”

Dean turned his frown on her “D’ya think we’re doing the right thing? Should we just be ignoring him? I mean, I know he barely says a word these days, but he was such a goddamn prat, and then there was the whole… sixth year thing.”

Hermione crossed her arms and kicked her heels into the base of the couch. “I don’t know Dean. I sometimes agree, and sometimes I just remember how terrified he looked every moment of sixth year. And… When Bellatrix had me, he looked so sick. His mum was holding his arm like she thought she might have to keep him there. Not to mention he tried really hard not to identify us. So, I don’t know. He did some completely reprehensible things, but he was also a kid who was scared. That’s why Harry and I testified at his trial. We both believe he truly regretted the things he did and felt like he didn’t have a way out.”

“Oh. That makes sense I guess.” Dean patted her knee awkwardly then leaned back into the arm of the couch. “I guess I’ll keep doing it then, you and Luna are a fair sight smarter than me.”

Hermione smiled and nudged his knee with hers before lapsing into a surprisingly comfortable silence.

\-----

When the first real snow fell a week and a half later, Luna wandered past in her summer robes and a Slytherin scarf between classes and Hermione didn’t even have to guess who it belonged to. Two days later, Malfoy returned her quick smile across the Great Hall with a small nod before turning to Theo Nott and eating like nothing had happened. Dean and Malfoy actually had a short conversation about their charms homework that day as well. A week later Luna said he’d held the door for her to leave a classroom and was very polite about it.

Hermione was a little conflicted, she was more than happy to have far less Malfoy in her life. And while Lunas plan seemed to be doing very little to reduce the amount of times Malfoy popped up in her day, he was a lot more pleasant when he did. When she wrote to them about it Ron and Harry both said they thought he was messed up by the war, and to keep an eye on him, but to otherwise ignore him. Ron slightly more vehemently so, with repeated references to mustelids.

When the December Hogsmeade weekend came up, Hermione organised to meet up with Ron and Harry, then walked with Ginny and Luna through the crisp morning air to The Three Broomsticks. Once she spotted messy black and shaggy red hair she ran forward, embracing Harry but pausing when she turned to her boyfriend. Ron was noticeably pale and miserable, and she saw Harry kick him under the table.

“Uh, hi, Mione. Um, mind if we chat outside for a minute?”

Hermione was no fool, she knew what was about to happen from the sad look on his face, and she nodded then followed him out of the pub quietly.

Ron sucked in a breath once outside and rubbed the back of his neck. “Look, Mione, You’re one of the two most important people in the world to me, you know that, yeah?”

Hermione sighed and decided to put him out of his misery. “I know Ron, and I feel the same. Do you want to go back to being friends?”

All the tension left Ron as he slumped his lanky frame into the wall behind him before pushing off and pulling her into a hug, patting her wild hair with his calloused hand. “Thank Merlin. I thought I was going to bollocks this up big time. You’ll always be my best friend Mione. I think I just thought we had to be more because I do love you so much, but now I’m not sure it’s in a romantic way, is that okay?”

Hermione hugged him back “It is. It really is. If this was sixth year, or even last year, I think I’d feel differently. But now, I think we will always be something so close ‘Best Friend’ doesn’t really cover it. It’s just not in a romantic way, as you put it. You, me, and Harry have something special, and I’m so glad we had this talk.” She got a little misty eyed as she finished and Ron pulled back.

“You sure?” He held her shoulders, his blue eyes searching hers as he bent down to her level. “I don’t want to hurt you Mione.”

“I really am okay, just overwhelmed I think. Do you mind going back in? I’ll follow you shortly.” She gave him a watery smile and stepped back a little from him.

“Okay, I will. Do you want me to send out Harry or Gin? Luna even?”

“No. I really am glad we are going back to being friends, to be quite honest. I just need a moment.”

Ron nodded and moved to head back into the pub, before turning back with a lopsided grin. “Hey, do I at least have the emotional range of a Tablespoon now?” Before ducking through the door while Hermione laughed quietly to herself.

Quietly Hermione walked into the little laneway next to The Three Broomsticks and sat on an overturned crate, elbows on knees and chin in her hands. Barely a minute passed before she felt a hesitant touch on her shoulder. Looking up at Malfoy she straightened her back and sighed.

“You heard that then? I’m fine, truly. I’ve just realised that Ron would have been… easy. Life would have been predictable and quiet. Nothing bad or terrible about that, but we work best as friends. We should both have a chance for something more than just the path of least resistance.” She gave a soft chuckle. “I’m just very surprised he figured that out before me.”

“Do you want me to go too?” Malfoys deep voice startled Hermione, she didn’t think she’d even heard him speak in class this year.

“Surprisingly, no. I think you might be the kind of company I need.” Using her wand she dusted off another box and moved it next to hers. Malfoy stiffly sat down and leaned forwards with his interlaced fingers propping up his chin.

“For what it’s worth, that was the most mature break up I have ever seen.” Malfoys grey eyes watched her while he faced forwards, as if he was unsure how she would take that statement. He jumped when she burst into giggles.

“Oh my gosh, it really was. How on earth did Ronald Weasley and Hermione Granger not have a volatile break up? We fight about _everything_!” Fighting the giggles back, Hermione turned to face Malfoy. “Thanks Malfoy, I was okay before, and now I actually feel reasonably good about the whole affair. I owe you one.”

“I can promise, you don’t owe me a thing.” Malfoy shrugged. “Have a good one Granger.”

Hermione watched him saunter off before heading back into the pub, where she had a wonderful afternoon with her friends hearing all about Auror training, and felt like something had settled back into its rightful place.

\-----

Malfoy opened up a little after that, and Hermione resented him a little less for his odd need to check on her, Luna, and Dean. He’d hold doors if they were leaving a room at the same time, say a quiet hello to them as they passed. Luna seemed to sport his scarf whenever it was cold. Dean said that he even sat and helped him with a potions essay he was stuck on.

And Hermione found herself with a silent study partner in the quiet space she’d found at the back of the library. They almost never talked, and when they did it was always a question about whatever they were working on. He was quick on the uptake when he asked something, and when she had been frustrated with a question for Ancient Runes but unwilling to admit she didn’t know the answer, he’d glanced at her work, then simply pushed a slim red book over the table to her so she could find her own answer. She came to appreciate that he really was second in grades to her for a reason, not nepotism like she’d assumed.

Finally, after two weeks of quiet study sessions with only a few days before most of the school went home for Christmas, she asked the question she really wanted to.

“Why us three?”

Malfoy went totally still, and Hermione realised it was probably entirely too soon to ask that. Time ticked past and she was just about to tell him it was okay, and to forget she asked, when he answered her.

“I spent most of last year out of school.” Malfoy paused again, back ramrod straight as he put his quill down with too much care and stared at it. “When I was here there was so little I could do to help anyone, but I could at least try. Redirect detentions to me instead of the Carrows, turn a blind eye, teach the little ones how to fake being crucioed. Hell, I once even managed to warn Finnegan about a raid they were planning.” His breathing quickened a little, and Hermione both wanted to reach out and comfort him, and stay absolutely still so he’d keep going. She chose the latter. “But at the Manor I was powerless. They were monsters, and they lived under my roof. The Dark… Voldemort killed the muggle studies teacher on my dining table and then fed her to that snake. Bellatrix used crucio to teach me occlumency. Greyback used to bring back his catches, and he was horrifying if he felt like playing with them. My father wanted me to take a more active role in their activities so he could claw back some power. Thank Merlin my mother shot that down, she said it was too risky to draw attention.  
“Then Lovegood was brought to the Manor. I’d seen people brought in so many times, but this was the first one I went to school with. I didn’t even know she was there for three days. The whole time she was stuck there, I couldn’t do anything for her. I knew she was being left alone, and I am so thankful for that, but I couldn’t help her beyond making sure she got some warm blankets and a little extra food. Even that was risky.  
“Thomas was brought in not long before you three. His leg was busted, and I know how to heal a broken bone, but I couldn’t heal him because I was being watched. I was planning to sneak down after a day or two, but I can’t honestly say I would have had the courage. In fact, to be perfectly honest, I most likely would have dithered until his leg was hard to heal properly and he was left with problems. If I managed to work up the courage to do it at all.  
“And then there was you.” Malfoy looked up at Hermione and she could _see_ the pain on his face. He looked like what he was trying to say was burning him. His pale skin was deathly and his jaw was clenched so hard she could hear it creak.

“You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want.” She said quietly.

Malfoy shuddered “Tell me to stop if you need me to, but no, I do need to say this.” Grey eyes fixed on her brown ones, he continued. “When I saw Potter, I knew it was him right away. I loathed him for six years, a swollen face couldn’t stop me from recognising him. Then I saw you and Weasley and I really knew we were all absolutely fucked. Something about you three has always been different, and I knew if you were gone then the war was going to get a lot worse. Then by some miracle, instead of sending straight for that bastard, they asked me to identify Potter. I should have done a better job denying it, but it was one of the most terrifying moments of my life, because if I denied it outright, and you three got handed to… Voldemort anyway. That was me and my mother dead.  
“Then it all went completely insane and the Snatchers were dead, Potter and Weasley were dragged off and you-“ He pressed his hands flat on the desk, and Hermione scarcely breathed, tears standing in both their eyes. “I have no idea how you’re so strong, but Salazars secrets, you are. Bellatrix was mental when she went after me, and I was her blood. I have no idea how much worse she was to you. Mother held my arm, she said later she was worried I’d do something crazy. But I was frozen, petrified. I nearly did something anyway though. I have no idea what I was thinking of doing, but that’s why I had my wand in my hand when Potter came at me.” Malfoy broke eye contact and buried his hands in his hair, shoulders shaking with stifled sobs. “I did, I wanted to help you, I swear. And now with you three especially I feel like I should be keeping you all safe, but where do I even fucking start?”

“An apology.” Hermione’s voice cracked and she tried again. “For me, I just want to know you really are sorry for the things you said when you were young and dumb. The big issues can be dealt with later. But I just want to know you regret making my life hell once I stepped into Hogwarts.” Her voice wavered, and she wanted to say more, but this was the starting point. This was where he could begin with her at least.

“Godric, Granger, I am so sorry. I was so envious and stupid when I was young. I parroted those words at you until I believed them, and by the time I realised I believed a lie and that you deserved not just to be here, but my respect, I thought it was too late. I was so far out of line for so long, and you have my unreserved apologies for every stupid fucking insult, hex, rumour, every moment of hurt or doubt I caused you.” Malfoy looked at her hopelessly, and she realised she believed him.

So she pushed herself around the table and hugged him, then promptly burst into tears. Malfoy pulled her to him and buried his face in her hair as she draped awkwardly over his chest and sobbed. He whispered broken apologies and promises to do better until her sobs began to calm and she went limp. Gently he moved her until she sat sideways on his lap and he stroked her hair as she sat with shuddering breaths trying to regain her composure.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome Granger.”

“Hermione.”


	2. Quiet

Watching the chaos of students scouring the common room for lost possessions before they headed home for Christmas while she waited with Dean for Neville to come down made Hermione very glad she had decided to turn down the position of Head Girl when it was offered to her. She wasn’t sure she had the patience for it anymore.

“Hermione, you ok?” Dean nudged her elbow with his hip. “You look a bit worried.”

“I was just thinking I wouldn’t have made a good Head girl this year. I wouldn’t want the responsibility anymore.” Hermione looked down at her bare feet. “Guess I just don’t know how to feel about it.”

“Hmm, I’d say if there’s anyone in this school who deserves a break from responsibility, it’s you.” Dean watched the chaos with her for a moment before running his hands over his hair. “Yeah, you get to do whatever you want this year I reckon. Anyone who says otherwise can take a long walk off a short pier.”

Hermione huffed a short laugh as Neville dragged his trunk up next to them “You’re probably right there. Honestly I think the lot of us deserve a good break.”

“Yeah. Anyway, I’ll see you after break? You sure you’re going to be ok?”

Hermione nodded and sent both Dean and Neville off with her assurances and a few tight hugs before deciding to go see Luna off as well.

Grabbing her shoes from the dorm that she shared with no one this year she headed out of the tower, stopping by Ginny’s dorm to say goodbye and reassure her that she really would be fine here at Hogwarts and telling her to give the Weasleys and Harry her love.

Luna was already in the entrance hall by the time Hermione tracked her down, packed and watching the prefects attempt to corral the students into some sort of order for the trip back to the station.

“Hello Hermione, did you come to see me off?” Luna smiled distractedly at her “That’s very kind of you. What do you plan to do with your holiday?”

“Study mostly.” Hermione gave a wry laugh “Boring, I know, but I’m looking forward to the peace and quiet.”

“I don’t think that’s boring, you study some very interesting things. I quite enjoyed talking to you about how to apply arithmancy to runes to create your own stacked runic circles for wards. It was a very clever way to make wards your own and choose who to let in to them. I would quite like to try that at home I think. And I do wonder if I can use it to engrave my necklace to increase its effectiveness at keeping nargles away.” She fingered the butterbeer cork around her neck.

“Possibly. I haven’t looked into doing it on jewellery yet, maybe I’ll do that after I finish my homework.” Seeing the students beginning to walk to the carriages by the path, Hermione hugged Luna “You have a good Christmas Luna, I’ll see you when you get back?”

“Of course, and you have a good break. Be careful to stay away from any mistletoe. Nargles always flock to it.”

Hermione watched Luna go, her long blonde hair blown into tangles by the wind and smiled to herself. Luna would always be Luna.

\-----

Christmas holidays brought a new surprise for Hermione in the form of Theo Nott. He and Malfoy were two of the five returning Slytherins, along with Blaise Zabini, Tracey Davis, and Daphne Greengrass. He also seemed to be one of the few people in the school talking to Malfoy at all, his wavy, brown hair by his side at every meal and most classes. So perhaps Hermione should not have been surprised when he joined her and Malfoy in the library after the Hogwarts Express had left.

“Hello Granger, do you and Draco ever leave the Library these days?” Theo slid into the seat beside Malfoy and propped his boot up on the table.

“Um, hello. It’s Theodore, isn’t it?” Hermione eyed his foot with a touch of distaste. “I don’t believe we’ve met before.” Theo had always been quiet until returning this year, when Hermione had noticed he’d come out of his shell quite a lot.

“I do believe you’re right. Theodore Nott at your service, but please call me Theo. Theodore sounds so dreadfully stuffy.” Theo said removing his foot and dipping a seated bow to her. He had a smile that made her think a bit of the Weasley Twins right before they unleashed some new mischief. “So, what shall we do with all our spare time now? Study? Play chess? Cause trouble? Gossip? Tell your new friend all about tall, dark, and handsome?”

Malfoy groaned and put his head in his hands “Dammit Theo. I already said I wasn’t getting into this.”

Hermione looked between the pair of them, utterly confused. “What’s going on?”

Theo draped an arm over the back of Malfoys chair and smirked at her with a twinkle in his hazel eyes. “Well dear, I find myself quite interested in Draco’s new friends. As the man who’s known him since we were both knee high to a bowtruckle, I simply must ensure he is making good friends. You and Lovegood are lovely, but your tall friend, well, I simply must know all about him.”

Hermione began to bristle at the implication that they wouldn’t be good friends before Malfoy interrupted. “He’s trying to say he has a thing for Thomas and wants an introduction.”

“Oh. Oh! That was not what I expected. Why not just say hello to him?”

Theo scoffed “Well, who knows how that would go? Draco here had to stalk you three for a month or two before he was able to say hi. His choice I know, but I am not a patient wizard. So, what makes Dean Thomas tick?”

Malfoy thumped his head on the table. “Theo, stop being an idiot.”

“Well, my oldest chum, you refused to give me an introduction so I had to find alternative routes didn’t I?” Theo looked so pleased with himself that Hermione had to laugh.

“Gosh, you do come on strong! I never would have guessed, you always seemed quiet.”

“He’s doing it specifically to embarrass me, Hermione.” Malfoy hasn’t moved his head off the table, and his voice is somewhat muffled. “I said I didn’t think it was a good idea and now he’s out to prove me wrong.”

“Oh. Uh, are you actually interested in Dean?” Hermione is more than a little thrown to find that Theo is so different to what she expected. By Malfoy behaving so much like any of her other friends would if caught in this situation too, if she’s perfectly honest with herself.

“Quite. I like them tall and handsome. Nice is a bonus.” Theo settles back a little and stops the air of overstated cockiness.

“Well, then I may as well tell you that Dean is bisexual then.” At Theo’s confused head tilt she elaborates “He likes both men and women. It’s not a secret, he just doesn’t shout about it.”

“Well then, this changes things! Now I’m not only interested, but I have a chance!” Theo leant forward in his seat and winked at Hermione “I don’t suppose he decided to stay for break?”

“No, he’s gone home. But maybe you can spend the next two weeks convincing me you’re not a prat so I’ll let you anywhere near him.” Hermione smirks back at him and laughs at his shocked expression.

“Is that all? Merlin, I half expected to have to write four feet of parchment detailing why I should be allowed to even look at him.” Theo gave her a genuine smile “I do actually want to get to know you too, by the by. With dear old dad gone, I don’t have to keep to myself anymore. It’s very liberating.”

“So we’ve noticed.” Malfoy clipped, sitting up and looking distinctly disgruntled.

Theo clapped him on the shoulder and rose, sauntering off from whence he came, calling back “Well, I can recognise a cue to leave. See you round, Granger.”

Hermione chuckled, glancing at Malfoy. He had his hands balled into nervous fists in front of him on the table, grey eyes searching her face and looking worried.

“Was… Was that okay? Theo’s not bad, I’ve known him my whole life. He kept to himself before, only laughed at the pranks if he thought he might get called out for not going along with it. I swear he’s not a bad person, just kept his head down because his dad was a bastard.” Malfoy’s lips tighten to cut off his ramble and he looks away from her to frown at the wall. “Sorry, I mean to say he doesn’t mean any harm.”

Hermione reaches across the table and places a hand over one of his “Malfoy… Draco… It’s fine. Dean will probably be flattered if anything. You seemed more embarrassed to be put on the spot than worried about it, and I know that with everything that in itself is very telling. So, may as well just let them be normal teenagers and figure it out themselves.”

Draco nods slowly and relaxes his hand under hers. “Thanks, Hermione. I didn’t know what to do about that. I appreciate you not freaking out.”

Hermione waved off his thanks and gives his hand a quick squeeze before going back to her work until dinner.

\-----

The next day in the mostly empty Great Hall, Hermione nearly spilled tea all over herself when Theo came barrelling over to the Gryffindor table dragging Draco behind him and threw them both into the seats across from her.

“Good morning Hermione, Draco tells me you haven’t got much homework left. So I thought I’d drag you two down to the lake for a walk.” Theo thrust a carafe of coffee at Draco and grabbed a pastry for himself. “What do you say?”

Hermione blinked at him for a second before gathering her wits. “Well, I have two essays left to complete, but I can spare the morning. What did you have planned?”

“A walk, like I said. I just want to get some fresh air.” Theo looked a little too at home at the Gryffindor table, like he was making a conscious effort to be as nonchalant as possible. Draco, on the other hand, looked like he was hoping the floor would swallow him. “Draco needs to get out too. Poor boy gets any paler and he’ll match the snow.”

“Alright, I’ve just finished eating, so I’ll go get my coat and meet you back in the Entrance Hall. See you when you’re done eating.” Hermione smiled at them while she packed her book back in her bag and walked back to her dormitory to get her winter coat.

When she came down to the Entrance, Theo’s eyes bugged out of his head. “Merlin Granger, are you wearing a shiny pillow?”

“Hah, no. It’s a Muggle winter coat, they’re very comfortable and water proof.” She rolled her eyes as Theo poked at her snow jacket.

“Well, I have decided I need one.” Theo stopped poking at her and widened his hazel eyes in what she thought was him trying to look innocent. “Don’t suppose you’d be willing to help me procure one? I’ll pay?”

“Seriously?” Hermione laughed, finding Theo quite a lot of fun. “Sure, why not? I’ll owl a friend of mine and they can go get one while they’re on holidays and bring it back to school. I’m pretty sure I can guess your size.” She spotted Draco looking curious at her jacket too so she held out her arm and teased him “Want to poke my shiny pillow too?”

Draco raised an eyebrow “I have before, in Hogsmeade. I just can’t figure out what the blazes it’s made of.”

“It’s called polyester. A common synthetic fabric in the Muggle world.” She began to head out the doors “It’s really very handy for things like waterproof clothing.”

The next hour was spent ambling around the shore of the lake and answering questions about the Muggle world. None of them wanted to talk about anything heavy, so she answered questions about things like TV and telephones. Theo particularly seemed fascinated by the idea of computers, while Draco said that CDs sounded a lot easier to handle than records and gramophones. Slowly the topics turned deeper, despite their efforts to keep things light.

“I wish I had been able to explore all this earlier.” Theo’s face was blank as he looked over the Lake. “My father would have most likely put me six feet under if I’d even looked curious at your jacket. Before he got himself killed anyway.”

Draco shifted a little closer to Theo. “I know. Mother might have a fainting spell when she hears I’ve been asking questions about telephones. As for Father, well… Makes me glad he’s stuck in Azkaban. And that I’m head of the House now, so he can’t do anything about it anyway.”

Hermione held her breath, not sure how to react to that level of honesty for a moment. She reached out and laid a small hand on each boys forearm. “Just so you know, I’m happy to answer any questions you have. And… And I think you two are doing something wonderful by learning about the other side of things.”

Draco turned to look at her, while Theo stayed facing front before clearing his throat. “Thanks Granger. For the lesson and everything else. I might head back, need a moment and all that emotional stuff.” He avoided both their eyes as he began the cold walk to the castle.

Draco heaved a frustrated sigh and ran a hand through his platinum blonde hair. “Sorry Hermione, we weren’t trying to get so heavy there.”

Hermione leaned closer to him and laid her head on his bicep. “I know. It’s ok.”

\-----

Hermione watched one of the school owls take her request for two Muggle jackets, with a crisp £100 note included, off to Dean. She thought Theo might get a kick out of Dean being the one to pick them.

Frosty air puffed from her lips as she watched long after the owl disappeared from sight. The peace of the grounds felt pure and clean. Her heart was lulled by the snow blanketed ground, while her mind slowly listed every person who had died or been maimed in the war. The odd feeling was probably the calmest she’d felt since returning to Hogwarts, just pure acceptance.

Draco stepped up to her side, silent as he always was. She wondered if he silenced his shoes when he was stalking them around Hogwarts.

“I’m ok.”

“I thought so. I just wanted to check.”

Huffing a laugh, Hermione watched the Forbidden Forest sprawl out as far as she could see. “You know, since I came back, there’s always been this thrum of fear and loss. But today… Today I feel like I can accept that for what it is. It hurts, but I don’t feel like I have to run from it today.” She felt his finger just barely brush the sleeve of her jacket, in comfort or solidarity. “We all lost so much, but the fact that we can stand here, whole-ish and hale, is a miracle. There’s so much we all went through, so much that was so very unnecessary. But we came out the other side, and we can all stand up to make a difference now. We’ve all been forced into situations and learnt lessons we shouldn’t have, so that we can pass the knowledge and need for a kinder world on. I know I plan to.  
“There is so much to be done. So much work for everyone. Whether it’s passing new laws and catching the monsters that are left, or just providing shelter and a warm place for people to be. We can do so much, all of us. And Merlin, I can’t wait to see what our generation can do.”

Hermione tilted her head back to look at Draco and found him already looking at her, his eyes like rain heavy clouds. Slowly he raised one hand and brushed the back of one finger along her jaw, lighter than a butterflies wing, before laying his long fingers along her jaw and bending down to brush a kiss just as soft against her lips.

“Hermione, I can’t wait to see what _you_ will do.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO, this keeps going in my head. It originally started as a little one shot, just to get out of my own head. An excersise in just putting things on metaphorical paper with no plan. But it grows when I think of it. Both chapters so far have felt both complete and incomplete, so I have no idea whether I will write the rest of what is bouncing around in my head or not.
> 
> Time will tell, I guess.


	3. Ash

Hermione lay on her side on one of the overstuffed couches in the Gryffindor common room, staring unblinking at the cheery fire burning in the great stone hearth while her mind whirled unceasingly. After Draco had kissed her, she’d stared at him like a complete idiot until he had turned pink and fled the Owlery, muttering apologies.

She knew he’d changed quite a lot over the course of the war, and she knew that after all their study sessions he possibly thought of her as something more like a friend than just someone to shadow around to make sure they were safe. But she really hadn’t realised that his changed opinions had extended to kissing Muggleborns.

She didn’t know how to feel about the kiss. Or, that’s what she was telling herself. In reality, a tiny part of her mind was preening that a handsome boy had kissed her and then told her he thought she would achieve a lot. Groaning, she stuffed a pillow over her face and realised that she wasn’t going to be able to squash that little voice. She gave herself a great mental kicking for being too shocked to do anything except gape at him, because even though it was short, the soft kiss had been heady.

Lying there wasn’t helping anything, so Hermione threw the pillow from her face and stood up with determination writ large in her stance.

“Right then! Nothing for it!” Marching to the common room door, she began the trek down to the dungeons. She’d bet anything he was hiding there.

-

Sadly, Draco either wasn’t in the Slytherin common room, or was ignoring her knocking. Grumbling to herself about how she should have kept a book handy just in case, Hermione cast a cushioning charm on the floor across from the Slytherin entrance and settled down to wait for someone who could tell her where he was. It was nearly lunch time, surely it couldn’t be too long.

A half hour later Hermione was sitting in the middle of a swarm of conjured glowing butterflies when the entrance opened on a startled sixth year.

“Oh, hello! Is Draco Malfoy in there?” Hermione brushed off her skirt and smiled at the dark haired girl. She supposed that Hermione Granger sitting in a bunch of butterflies across from the Slytherin common room was quite a sight.

“Oh, Uh… I don’t know.” The girl blinked her huge blue eyes at the butterflies and Hermione smiled and sent one over to hover in front of her. The girl smiled charmingly at the butterfly. “These are very good, I can never get them right.”

“I could probably teach you, it took me a while too.”

The girl looked shocked enough that Hermione laughed. “Sorry, I just thought everything came easy to you! I’m Astoria.” She held out one elegant hand.

Taking her hand, Hermione smiled. “Nice to meet you. I’m Hermione. If Draco isn’t around, do you know if Theo Nott is?”

Astoria turned back to the entrance. “He’s asleep on a couch, would you like me to get him?”

Thinking of how upset he’d been when he left the lake earlier, Hermione shook her head. “No, I’ll wait.” She caught the captivated way Astoria was still looking at her butterflies and chuckled. “Want me to teach you the trick now?” Astoria’s eager nod turned her chuckles into sweet laughter and she decided she liked the diminutive girl.

-

Draco didn’t come out for lunch, and by dinner Hermione was fretting that she’d ruined everything. She’d thought her tentative friendship with him was nice, a weird kind of comfort. Studying quietly with him, even the way he still followed her around to ensure her safety. At the beginning of the year she would have hexed anyone who suggested she’d be trying to find Draco to talk to him about the fact that he kissed her, but now she would take all the help she could get.

So when she saw Theo saunter in to the Great Hall extremely late for dinner she leapt up from her seat and dragged the lanky boy by the elbow right back out and towards the dungeons.

“What the- Granger? What’s going on?” Theo stumbled after her quick steps.

“Come on, we’re going to the kitchens and then you’re taking me into your dorm.” Hermione turned the corner into the hallway that led to the kitchens just as Theo managed to pull his arm from her grip and stop walking.

“Not sure if I’ve been clear enough about this, love, but you don’t have the right equipment for me.” Theo dryly observed. “What’s this about?”

Hermione spun on her heel and faced him, her small fists planted on her hips and curls bouncing into her face. “I need to talk to Draco, and I’m fairly certain he’s holed up in your dorm.”

Theo eyed her warily, crossing his arms and rocking back on his heels. “Listen Granger, I don’t know what he said or did to you, but I’m not going to take you in there just so you can kill him or whatever.”

Hermione stomped her foot in a fit of pique. “Oh for- No. I’m not going to murder him, I need to apologise to him!”

Theo cocked his head, apparently thunderstruck that she would need to apologise to Draco. “You what?”

“I need to apologise. He did something… Unexpected and nice. But I made him feel awkward enough that he ran off. I spent the rest of the morning and lunch sitting outside your common room waiting for him, but he never came out.” She slumped her shoulders in defeat. “I just want to talk to him.” She whispered.

Theo ran an exasperated hand over his face. “Right, well. For all of our sanity I’m going to pretend I don’t know _exactly_ what he did. But how do you know he’s in the dorm?”

Hermione blinked. “I… Don’t actually. I just decided he must be?”

Theo just shakes his head at her. “You better give me a glowing recommendation next time you talk to Thomas.” He marched past her, skipping the kitchens entirely. “C’mon, we’re closer to the dorms than his other bolt holes, so we’ll check there first.”

-

As it transpires, Draco is not in his dormitory, nor in the unused classrooms or hidden alcoves Theo takes her to. After a fruitless hour of searching, Hermione tells Theo to go to the kitchens to eat because she knows he hasn’t had lunch. Then she turns her steps towards the seventh floor corridor.

She finds Draco there in the Room of Requirement, surrounded by the ashes of lost things. He’s a pale marble statue in the blackened room, sitting on the floor with his legs crossed and his head bowed. His icy hair is smudged with soot and his face is smudged with tear tracks while he is frozen in the literal ashes of their war. A study of the aftermath of war carved by a master. For a brief moment, Hermione is sure that she’s never seen anything as beautiful as he is.

“I wonder how much of this ash is Vincent.” He murmurs as she sits next to him and her heart clenches painfully for him at the absolute lack of inflection in his voice. “I shouldn’t be so surprised he turned out the way he did, but he was one of my first friends.”

Hermione watches as he begins to sift the ashes through his fine boned hands, transfixed by the way they fall in clumps and specks. “Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.”

Draco laboriously lifts his head to look her in the eyes. His own eyes are dull like the ashes running through his fingers. “A poem?”

Hermione takes a handful of ash and weighs it in her palms. “It’s part of Muggle funerary rites from the Common Book of Prayer.” She presses her hands over her tiny handful and closes her eyes in concentration. “ _Forasmuch as it hath pleased Almighty God of his great mercy to take unto himself the soul of our dear brother here departed, we therefore commit his body to the ground; earth to earth, ashes to ashes, dust to dust; in sure and certain hope of the Resurrection to eternal life, through our Lord Jesus Christ; who shall change our vile body, that it may be like unto his glorious body, according to the mighty working, whereby he is able to subdue all things to himself._ ” She hands Draco her handful of ash, now encapsulated in a tiny clear bubble of crystal. “When my grandmother died, the priest said that at the funeral.”

Draco gingerly took the bauble, turning it to watch the ashes rattle around. “So they believe… in becoming dust so they can live forever with Lord Jesus Christ?” His tone is still flat, but Hermione is sure he’s not mocking her.

She shrugs. “Some do. Grandma did. My parents took me to church sometimes to the big services, but they never believed.” The tiniest hint of a smile dimples her cheek for the space of a hummingbirds heartbeat. “Especially not after we found out I was a witch. I think a lot of Muggles find security in their religions, sometimes it strays into zealotry or bigotry, but many are like Grandma. People who just desire a reason.”

“Zealotry and bigotry, huh? I guess I’m all too familiar with that.” Draco curls his fist around the bubble of ashes. “I wonder if there’s a good side of being a pureblood though?”

Hermione thinks quietly, not wanting to rush her answer. “I think… That maybe. I don’t know enough about it to judge, most of the purebloods who were kind to me before this year simply ignored the fact that they were.” She lays her head against his shoulder and closes her eyes. “But if you’d like, we can research it together. Find the traditions that are worthy to you.”

Draco rests his cheek on top of her head. “Not to you?”

“Perhaps. I’m sure there are a lot of fascinating rituals and traditions to be found. Both in England and abroad. Things that have been passed down for generations that you probably do without even thinking.” She sits quietly next to him, content to let him take the lead from there.

After a long silence, he speaks, barely above a whisper. “I’m sorry for earlier. I got… carried away.”

Hermione rubs her cheek on his arm. “There is nothing to be sorry for, Draco. I was surprised, but not mad. I actually came to apologise to you.”

“Why?” Still their voices are soft, not wanting to disturb the Grave of Lost Things.

“Why I’m not mad or why I came to apologise?”

“Both I guess.”

Hermione sighed and nudged his arm until she could tuck under it to fight off the chill of the room. “Well, I came to apologise because I stood there like a bloody idiot after you kissed me instead of doing something. And as to why I’m not mad? It’s a bit more complicated.” She traced absent patterns in the ash on his knee. Mad swirls with no beginning , end, or meaning. “At the very surface, I guess it’s because a pretty boy kissed me and told me I was smart.”

Draco settled his arm around her shoulders. “And at a deeper level?”

Hermione watched her fingers as they drew, not truly seeing what they were drawing. “You and I are changed. We aren't who we were before, and we both know what it’s like to be thrown into a conflict we should have had no business in. We came out of the war quieter, more introspective. And somewhat damaged. You accept that in me, where everyone else who wants to protect me strives to push those parts out of me. I’m aware that your drive to protect Luna, Dean, and I is not just physical. But despite that you’ve never tried to fix me or been frustrated that there are parts of me that are so different they may be unrecognisable. You just… see me.”

Draco lifted his other hand and held up the bauble to the meagre light. “That’s why I kissed you. Out of everyone, you see me. As soon as Luna dragged me out of the shadows and into your path, you understood what I needed. You never pushed me to be more than I could be, and you instinctively know what I need. When I was burning inside with the need to apologise to you, you asked me ‘Why us?’ and drew the story out of me like poison and healed me with your tears. When I couldn’t see a future, you included me in your desire to see our generation change the world. And when I sat here staring at the ashes and thinking how much of my friend was here and how much of my past, you said a Muggle prayer and handed me a piece of it wrapped in crystal.” Draco shifted them so he could look her in the eyes. “Hermione, you _see me_. And standing in that Owlery, possibly the least charming location in the entirety of Hogwarts, you looked like Magic. Pure, unadulterated Magic.”

Hermione lifted a hand and traced the tracks his grief had left on his cheeks, the ash on her fingers erasing them. “Draco, I’m not healing you. You are. Your confession drew that poison from your soul. You saw the future standing next to me. And you listened to a prayer that I don’t believe and let it soothe your pain.”

Draco turned his face into her hand and kissed the palm, his lips dry and chapped. “You are too good for me, Hermione.” He said it like he believed it, but desperately wanted it to be a lie.

“No Draco. And even if I were, then that means it’s my decision to make.” Hermione lifted to her knees, never taking her hand from his cheek, and leaned in close. “So either way…” She trailed off.

Hermione pressed her lips to Draco’s, and the kiss tasted of ash and new beginnings.

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally going to be a one shot, but I reached a really good break point and decided to go for at least two. Hopefully I'll finish up the next part soon.  
> For now This fic is rated Mature simply for the feelings it deals with. I still am unsure how far I'll push things later though, so it may go up in rating.  
> When I am writing, I often find myself thinking of the stories in terms of drawings or paintings. Choosing the tone based on what kind of medium they make me think of. 'Protection' is a charcoal sketch in my mind, both complete and incomplete at any given moment. I enjoy sketching with charcoal because you can smudge the lines to create a new detail, but the ghost of the old line will always be there. Hense why I mix present and past tense throughout the story; to create the feeling of just being slightly off balance among the ghosts of the past while they reach for the future.
> 
> And ferrets are mustelids, for anyone who was wondering!


End file.
